as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
All I want is dick and wine.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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