playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
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Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
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I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
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