Have you finally orgasmed yet?
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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