Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
