There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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