Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
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Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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