Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
you guys were way drunker than both of me
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
