You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
This baby is an asshole
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
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