whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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