Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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