Well douche your snatch and let's go!
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I can feel your judgement through the phone
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize