why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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