On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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