i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
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Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
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As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
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