i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize