Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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