We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
