Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
