your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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