Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
This toilet bowl is my home.
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