I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
can u get pink eye on your cock?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I woke up under a house in Key West
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