Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
