Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I could make wine with my vomit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize