In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
