Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(904): View more from Florida

I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand

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(804): View more from Virginia

remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.

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(636): View more from Missouri

she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(540): View more from Virginia

I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments

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(631): View more from New York

Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...

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(517): View more from Michigan

woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.

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(864): View more from South Carolina

Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.

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