What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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