Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
