i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
