dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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