I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
