Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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