Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
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i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
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Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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