i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize