I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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