Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
