he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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