where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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