Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
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