My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize