She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
