I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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