There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize