I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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