the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
