Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
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