He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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