1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
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