If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.