bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
