Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
