I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
