Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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